Why can't pencils have babies?

Because they have rubbers on their end.

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Pencil Jokes More Pencil Jokes

Where do pens and pencils go on vacation?

Pennsylvania

Who is better? The 3rd wave feminist or the pencil?

The pencil is better. It has a point.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

How did the Italian chef break up with his girlfriend?

Pasta la vista, baby."

How do you make cottage cheese?

You shake a baby.

End Jokes More End Jokes

Why did linkin park wrap themselves up in plastic wrap before they jumped off a cliff?

So in the end they didn't even splatter.

How does ISIL prefer their eggs?

Sunni side up at first. But they always end up scrambled.

Rubber Jokes More Rubber Jokes

What do you get if you encase Beyonce in rubber and drop her off a cliff?

Bouncy Beyonce.

What did the rubber say when he was offered a job as the high school choir teacher?

I can't, I'm not a conductor." Pffffffhehewheheheheheh.