Why do men, on average, die before women?

Because they want to.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Which do you want to hear first?

Paul: I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first? Michael: The good news. Paul: The good news is that I have no bad news.

Which of the following lines will do a better job of frightening a man away?

1) Get away or I'll call the police!!! 2) I love you and want to marry you and have your children.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why couldn't the Coast Guard save the hippie?

Because he was wayyy far out man.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs playing in the leaves?

Russell.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Who was the famous writer, that died in WWII?

I don't know Anne Frankly I don't care.

What did the cocaine addict say to his drug of choice?

I'm kinda busy, I won't be able to stay any longer, smell ya later" PS: the addict died that day from severe delusions that his coke was talking blanket, lot of coke....

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How do you know he's a peeping tom?

Woman: "When I asked him what he was doing out there, he said 'I was trying to get a pikachu'".

Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver?

Because she was a woman