Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac?

Because they always take things... Literally

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Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why did the kleptomaniac dislike the insultingly boisterous man with a cleft palate?

He couldn't take any more lip!

Why can't you tell pun jokes to kleptomaniacs?

Because they always take things literally

Metaphor Jokes More Metaphor Jokes

What's a metaphor?

Winning the game tournament!

When is a 2 literally a 6?

When it has metaphor.