Why isn't my hand 12 inches?

Because then it would be a foot

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

What is the difference between a podiatrist and Ginger Baker?

A podiatrist bucks up your feet.

What has two feet, two hands, two eyes, and two noses?

Two pirates.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do you call a tree that you can fit in your hand?

A PALM TREE!!!

How do you cut a turd into 5 pieces?

Squish it in your hand.

12 Inch Jokes More 12 Inch Jokes

Why isn't my hand 12 inches?

Because then it would be a foot

What's white and 12 inches long?

Absolutely nothing.