Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why did the Arabic man ask for her hand in marriage?

Because she stole his heart

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed?

To catch her false teeth.

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why can't you trust anything MATTER says?

Because it makes up everything.

What do you get if you cross a Buddhist monk and a 16 year old blonde cheerleader?

Arrested for procurement of a minor. Trust me on this one.

Mention Jokes More Mention Jokes

How are 4chan and Tumblr alike?

They usually announce a trigger warning before mentioning a school shooting

What was the first mention of soccer in the bible?

When Jesus went up for the cross.