Why the turnout at Michael Jackson's funeral?

He touched a lot of people.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What are you people doing?

making this crap up.

What's next - people marrying dogs?

nervous glance at dog Dog: Frank, we've been over this. I like you as a friend

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

What do you call Bruno Mars?

Michael Jackson the third.

What do Michael Jackson and Jimmy Savile have in common?

they touched some many lives

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

How do locomotives know where they're going?

Lots of training.

What do you call a rapper who masterbates a lot?

Lil Wayne-ker

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What's the definition of perfect pitch?

A: When an accordion is thrown down the toilet without it touching the sides.

Where do you touch a woman to give yourself the most pleasure?

The back of her head.