How can you tell that a politician lies?

His lips are moving

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Who's there ! Al ! Al who ?

Al lied !

Why were the hens lying on their backs with their legs in the air ?

Because eggs were going up !

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a factory worker, and a chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized'

Why did you kick that ball straight at the school computer?

Pupil: You told me to put it in the Net.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Why did the kleptomaniac dislike the insultingly boisterous man with a cleft palate?

He couldn't take any more lip!

What goes "Ooooooooooo!"?

A cow with no lips.

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to change it, and the other one to change it back again.

What is the best place for politicians?

Election posters. There they are portable, silent and easy to remove.