How do you guys tweet from the toilet?

I poop with both hands.

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Poop Jokes More Poop Jokes

What's the first rule here, boys?

Kid:Don't poop your pants M:I was gonna say "have fun" but...OK.

What did one poop say to the other poop?

You smell

Toilet Jokes More Toilet Jokes

Where does a toilet keep his secrets?

In his diarrhea.

What did the hot dog say on the toilet?

Mustuuurd

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What's the worst part about meeting someone with Parkinson's?

Shaking hands.

How do you stop an Italian from talking?

Tie his hands together

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What am I doing with the rest of my life?

I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

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