How many retarded Italian gardeners does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: One but don't expect results.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many editors does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: It was supposed to be in place last week!

How many monastic women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None... they live an ascetic lifestyle and prefer to not use electricity.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many musos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's a pretty obscure number. You probably haven't heard of it.

How many white girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Pshh....white girls don't know how to screw.

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

How many Italians does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Two. One to change it and one to sprinkle it with Parmesan.

Why did the Italian get thrown out of the hotel?

He said "I wanna two sheet onna the bed".

Result Jokes More Result Jokes

What's the difference between a race car and a woman?

One costs a lot of money to maintain, keep running, and give you the results you want. The other has four wheels.

What is the difference between a BMW and a baby carriage?

The baby carriage is the result of last year's fun on wheels.

Expect Jokes More Expect Jokes

How can this cop expect me to show him my license when he took it away last month?

What an Idiot.

How do you estimate your kids lifespan?

Hand them a mechanical pencil with the lead out and see how the use it. Child A: look mom I'm a doctor! - expect them to live to 80+ years. Child B: look mom I'm a heroin user! - expect them to live to about 27.