What can relax you and drown you at the same time?

A one-hour facial.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How do you tell the time in the US?

By looking at a bomb

What is the most up-voted comment of all time?

repost"

Drown Jokes More Drown Jokes

What does Mickey Mouse do to Minnie Mouse after she drowns and he pulls her out of the water?

Mouse to Mouse resuscitation.

What did the drowning number theorist yell?

LOG LOG LOG LOG

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

What is green and goes a hundred miles per hour?

A fuel injected pickle.

How much does a plumber make in an hour?

It depends on how much crack he can produce.

Relax Jokes More Relax Jokes

What's my type?

Someone who is supportive. Someone who is warm. Someone I can just curl up and relax with. Wait I'm describing my bed again.

What is the philosophy of a necrophiliac?

Sit back, relax and crack open a cold one