Amburgers & Woot Beer! Edit: Thanks to my dad for this one.
Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
A sub-woofer! Thank you, I'll be here all day.
In their dadabase.
Hamster.
Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it.
The stand-up chameleon.
He didn't start off with the right foot. EDIT: Ortography
Because of their Crystal Balls EDIT: I'm not sure if anyone's posted this before my mum's sister emailed her from across the globe.(New Zealand) I laughed so hard I thought I'd put it here. Credit goes to my Mum's sister though.
Amburgers & Woot Beer! Edit: Thanks to my dad for this one.
