What does a philosopher put his/her food on?

A contemplate

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Philosopher Jokes More Philosopher Jokes

Why are we here?

Me: Philosophers still don't know 5: No, why are we HERE Wife: Your dad is lost and won't ask for directions

Why couldn't the philosopher make a living?

He made no sense. I tried, I really did.

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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Five. One to handle the bulb and 4 to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

Why was the cab driver contemplating his life?

Because he had nothing to chauffeur.