What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so."

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Why shouldn't you tell a pirate your secrets?

They ain't private ears. (I don't care if a six year old came to this first thirty years ago, it just came to me.)

Why did the little tugboat do what all of the other tugboats told him to do?

Pier pressure

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What is the most common question asked by iPhone users?

Does anyone have a charger I could use "

What did the ocean ask the scooba diver?

Water you doing here

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What breaks when you give it to a toddler?

Their hips.

When punching a toddler, how hard is too hard?

Calm down... I'm not talking about MY kid. I know how hard to punch her. I'm her mother.

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What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so."

What do quantum physicists do when life gives them lemons?

Everything