What has two legs and can't stand up?

Half a cat

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

What's the only thing better than a gold medal at the Paralympics?

Legs

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call it when Usain Bolt is standing next to your mom?

A runner in scoring position.

When do you kick a midget in the nuts?

When he stands next to your girlfriend and says her hair smells nice.

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What would you do if i won the lottery?

Wife: I'd take half and leave. Husband: Well here's $6 and you can start packing anytime now.

What would Paul McCartney say after losing both his legs?

Suddenly....I'm not half the man I used to be....."

Half Cat Jokes More Half Cat Jokes

What looks like half a cat ?

The other half !

What has two legs and can't stand up?

Half a cat