What is it about glow sticks that makes me want to dance in a field wearing fairy wings?

If only I hadn't taken so many drugs I'd know this.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How do you want me to label this stone armchair?

He said, "No man, clay chair."

Why did the kid with muscular dystrophy want to be an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, and a NASCAR driver when he grew up?

He had a lot of aspirations.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know if someone doesn't like Football and isn't going to watch the Super Bowl?

They'll tell you

How do you know a mod of /r/jokes is Asian?

dereted

Field Jokes More Field Jokes

What did the field say to the farmer?

Plow Me!

What do you call a farmer who's excellent at what he does?

Outstanding in his field

Drug Jokes More Drug Jokes

What kind of drugs to frogs take?

methamphibians.

What sort of drug does a duck use?

Quack cocaine

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the nun always wear a slip?

Sheer habit.

What do you call someone who wears a diaper fashioned from a map?

Incontinent

Dance Jokes More Dance Jokes

Why are native americans the best strippers?

Because when they dance they make it rain.

Where do snowmen go to dance?

The snowball!