What is my relationship?

Alex: No sorry tha- glares at wife I'll take YOU RUINED MY LIFE KAREN for $800 Alex

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*

What did the burglar give his wife for her birthday?

A stole.

00 Jokes More 00 Jokes

What's the difference between feminism and a $100 bill?

A $100 bill makes change

What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chick pea?

I'm not spending $100 to have a garbanzo on my face.

Ruin Jokes More Ruin Jokes

What does a tornado and a black person have in common?

It only takes one to ruin a good neighbourhood!

What do women and pine trees have in common?

Every time you try to get on one, they ruin it by getting sappy.

Relationship Jokes More Relationship Jokes

What do Super Mario Brothers, and relationships have in common?

Sometimes you have to slay a few dragons before you get to the princess

What is my relationship?

Alex: No sorry tha- glares at wife I'll take YOU RUINED MY LIFE KAREN for $800 Alex

Alex Jokes More Alex Jokes

What is my relationship?

Alex: No sorry tha- glares at wife I'll take YOU RUINED MY LIFE KAREN for $800 Alex

What is buoyancy?

Alex: I'm sorry. The answer we were looking for is, Whatever.