How is your job and your wife different?

I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the problem when your wife walks out of the kitchen?

The chain is too long.

What's the difference between life and wife's rant?

Life eventually ends.

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

Whatcha doin?

Papa would say, "I'M MINDING MY OWN DAMN BUSINESS." Best advice ever.

Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?

Never mind...it's tearable

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why don't lawyers enjoy playing golf?

Because it's too much like work what with all of the lying involved.

What did the Pelican say to the fish when he was running late for work?

I'll catch you later!

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why is the whole battalion yellow and slimy?

Me: I mustard the troops. General: ... Me: Just as you told me to, sir.

What happened when Helium told a joke?

There was no reaction

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What do Apple and Blackberry have in common?

Neither one has Jobs.

Why does Garfield hate Mondays?

He doesn't have a job.