What kind of eye disease do vampires get?

Dracular degeneration.

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What kind of gum do bees chew?

BUMBLEGUM. Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.

What kind of pants does agent Mulder wear?

Just a pair 'a normal pants.

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How do vampire football players get the mud off?

They all get in the bat-tub.

Why do vampires hate Texas Roadhouse?

They can not stand stakes!