What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a 16th-century seer who drinks straight out of the can?

No-straw-damus! (please be gentle on me as you berate me.)

Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy?

He was buying drinks.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call a monk that likes vaporwave?

A S C E T I C

Why aren't fish good tennis players?

They don't like getting close to the net!

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What does a woman want more than anything in the world?

Nothing. She's fine.

How are women and computers the same?

Neither take your 3.5 inch floppy anymore.. unless you pay extra.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What sort of aircraft does the Asian pilot who loves to greet people fly?

A herrocopter

Whats you favorite Christmas joke?

I know this is an unorthodox post, but, I would love to hear your favorites!

Sister Jokes More Sister Jokes

What do you call a sister who works for you?

Nun of your business.

What did Josh say when asked if his sister was good in bed?

I Duggar."

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

What doesn't Princess Leia like toy guns?

Because the Nerf hurt her.

What did the Russian woman say to her violent husband?

Vladislav, baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

When a guy texts "your beautiful," reply with "my beautiful what?

then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again.

Why is r/Jokes only text, and forbids external links?

Because black people can't be offended if they're only reading jokes.