When asked, 'Are you Twittering?

if I'm looking at my phone I now reply, 'No. I am not Twittering,' in a sort of flat monotone. And tweet.

Previous Random Joke Next

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What does religion and Ikea have in common?

The stuff they have looks good but its impossible to put together. huehue

Whats the difference between an Introverted Engineer and an Extroverted Engineer?

Introverted Engineer looks at His shoes when he's talking to you. Extroverted Engineer looks at Your shoes when he's talking to you.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the black dude say when his hippie girlfriend asked him to go to burning man with her?

Namaste here

How does a road reply when you ask it how work is going?

It's tiring.

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

What kind of rodent DDOS attacks Al Queda's Twitter account?

An anonimouse

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

Why did Frodo set his phone to vibrate?

He was afraid the ring would give him away.

What two letters do you say when you answer the phone?

LO

Sort Jokes More Sort Jokes

What sort of cheese do you use to get a bear to go on a outing with you?

Camembert

How do you sort out Ant and Dec?

Squash one and deal with the other later.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

How many have you derailed this year?

I replied, "I'm not sure, it's hard to keep track"

How do those even fit in your pants?

He replied "They fit like a glove."

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

Conversation

What am I doing with the rest of my life?

I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...