Where u going?

M: Do u have ANY idea how much paperwork I've got to do

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Idea Jokes More Idea Jokes

What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night?

He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.

How many homeless guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only 2, but I have no idea how you're gonna fit both of them inside a lightbulb.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

How can U make a difference?

Good Mourning! *(this pun is baaad and I feel terrible about it)*

How would u like that prepared?

ME: um medium well W: very good Me: oh god what have I just done

Paperwork Jokes More Paperwork Jokes

Where u going?

M: Do u have ANY idea how much paperwork I've got to do

How many civil servants does it take to change a light bulb?

Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to do the paperwork.