Why can't a blonde dial 911?

Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911? A: She can't find the eleven.

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What happens when i find a good joke?

I reddit.

Why have human fossils never been found in Iran?

Because homos in Iran do not exist.

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What's your emer- DOG: HE THREW A BALL BUT I CAN'T FIND IT DOG 911: He still holding it?

DOG: YES! HOW'D HE FETCH IT BEFORE ME

Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 Who?

YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET!!!!

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What's Isis' favorite race?

The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh.

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible