Why did Tim Tebow's mom protest against the Russian soup truck?

It contained a borscht ton.

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Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!

What do you call a weird Russian?

Off-Putin.

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Why did people use insulation containing deadly toxins?

It was asbestos they could do at the time!

What starts with e, ends with e, and only contains one letter?

an Envelope EDIT: My deepest Canadian apologies to those who are calling this a riddle. I always took it as a cheesy joke

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What 8 letter phrase means a healthy scratch?

Tim Tebow

Who is a presents favorite quarterback?

Tim TeBOW