Why do Buddhist monks have such sour faces?

Because they're acetic.

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Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners of the monastery?

Because they have no attachments.

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?

Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

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What do you get if you cross a Buddhist monk and a 16 year old blonde cheerleader?

Arrested for procurement of a minor. Trust me on this one.

What did the Buddhist monk say to the pizza guy?

Make me one with everything.