Why do husbands die before their wives?

They want to.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you say when you don't want anymore Heineken?

NeinIcant

What did the World Chess Champion ask Michael Jackson?

Do you want to be black, or white

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the difference between a paycheck and a D**k?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

Why do they call boats "she"?

Because the wives had to get on board somehow.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How many cynics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Doesn't matter. Lightbulb is going to die anyway.

Why did so many blacks die in Vietnam?

Every time someone said "Get down!" they jumped up and started dancing.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why don't you ever callout my name when we're making love?

Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you."

Why Arent You Taking Me With You To Bangkok?

Husband: Because Nobody Carries A Tiffin To A Restaurant. "If U Didn't Get It Go Watch Pogo":p