Why was the hipster so successful in the stock market?

He invested before it was cool.

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Hipster Jokes More Hipster Jokes

What did the hipster say when a starbucks opened in his neighborhood?

You can't gentrify this place! I just moved here!"

What do you call a hipster with a vasectomy?

A Fixie.

Stock Market Jokes More Stock Market Jokes

How is marijuana stock sold on the stock market?

Buy high sell higher.

Why was the hipster so successful in the stock market?

He invested before it was cool.

Invest Jokes More Invest Jokes

Why should you never invest in bakeries?

Because they have a high turnover rate.

Why did the chef invest in chicken and cow bones?

He wanted to buy stock options.