How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

What do liquid Draino and a Dutch stripper have in common?

They both slowly remove clogs. I'll see myself out... Hey, at least it was original. Thanks for the gold !

Why did the cellphone go to court?

Because it was charged with battery.

Wave Jokes More Wave Jokes

What do you do when you stumble upon a one-armed Polish man stuck in a tree?

You wave!

How do you get a one armed man off a tree?

You wave to him

Lifeguard Jokes More Lifeguard Jokes

What do you get when you cross a computer with a lifeguard?

A screensaver.

What did the lifeguard say to the hippie?

You're too far out, man.