Lifeguard Jokes

What do you get when you cross a computer with a lifeguard?

A screensaver.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy?

He was too far out, man.

How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."

What did the lifeguard say to the hippie?

You're too far out, man.

What does a lifeguard and a manager of a Curves have in common?

They both watch whales.

Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

He was too far out, man.

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Hippy Jokes More Hippy Jokes

What did the hippy say when I told him to get off my couch?

Namaste

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit !

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What did the computer do with his overgrown gardens...?

Mowed 'em.

What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes?

Nothing.

Wave Jokes More Wave Jokes

How do you get a one armed man off a tree?

You wave to him

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

Why are setups to jokes so important?

because seven ate nine.

What do you call a Roman warrior with hair in his mouth?

Gladiator Get it? Glad He Ate Her..

Manager Jokes More Manager Jokes

Why did Olly call the manager for help, outside the store?

For the watch..

What do you call a manager that hasn't grown up yet?

A kidager

Save Jokes More Save Jokes

Why women fail at saving money?

Have you ever seen a money-box (piggy bank) with a hole at the bottom...

How do you save a drowning black family?

As a .jpg

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What is the last thing a redneck says before he dies?

ya'll watch this!

Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent?

Because they contain a lot of fowl language.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

Why has Mexico never won olympic gold?

All those who can run, jump and swim are in Texas.

Why can't Mexicans win the Olympics?

Because every one that can run, jump or swim has already crossed the border.