How do you like your new teacher ?

Son: I don't. She told me to sit up the front for the present and then she didn't give me one !

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Present Jokes More Present Jokes

What's the downside of being a redneck kid at Christmas?

You only get presents from one set of grandparents.

How do you know when Santa Claus is nearby ?

You can feel his presents ...

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call a prehistoric humanoid who likes to take his time?

A meander-thal!

What do you call a guy in a wheelchair?

Whatever you like, what's he going to do about it anyway?

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell a chemist from a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce "unionized".

How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?

Tell her a joke on Wednesday!

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just sit in the dark and cry.

What happened when the elephant sat on the car?

A: Everyone knows a Mercedes Bends!