How long have you been in pain?

Women: It started at 7:45am on Monday while I was at work Men: Sometime between yesterday and 1997

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you start a hedgehog race?

Say "GAH".

What do Polar Bears and Black Men have in common?

They're real cute when they are young but at a certain age they start getting scary.

Yesterday Jokes More Yesterday Jokes

What's the difference between a cook and a homo?

Well, the cook stirs today's meal while the homo stirs yesterday's.

What does Miley Cyrus have for Christmas Dinner?

Twerky! I thought of that yesterday, apologies if you've heard it a thousand times already.

Pain Jokes More Pain Jokes

What's another name for a supernova?

A POPstar. HAHAHAHA. Living is pain. Unbearable. End me.

What do mathematicians drink?

Anything to ease the pain.

Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

Why does Garfield hate Mondays?

He doesn't have a job.