How old is your girlfriend?

She's52" "Haha, dude, she could be your mom!" "Yeah, actually it's yours"

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Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

Why are your eyes dilated?

Me: "Your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love" Mom: "What were you looking at " Me: "Memes"

What's big, thick, hairy, and makes babies?

Your mom.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a jazz musician without a girlfriend?

Homeless

What did the overbearing mother melon say to her son and his girlfriend?

You Cantaloupe.

Dude Jokes More Dude Jokes

Where is all the color white?

Bartender says, "dude, this is a gray bar.

How do you encourage a potter while he's glazing his bowl?

Way to go dude, you're kiln it!"