What do snotty vegetables do when they see something they don't like ?

They 'turnip' their noses.

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What does Rolf Harris like to play with on the piano?

A minor.

What was Arnold Schwarzenegger's answer when asked which historical person he would like to play in a movie?

I'll be Bach.

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Why does the Brotherhood of Steel from Fallout hate '80s music?

Because of the synths.

What’s the difference between an African elephant and an Indian elephant?

About 5000 miles.

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How do you spell "nose" is Spanish?

nose

Why do aardvarks make undesirable neighbors?

Because they always have their noses in other people's business!

Turnip Jokes More Turnip Jokes

What did the farmer say about his missing vegetables?

Lettuce pray they turnip.

What did the farmer say to Lil Jon?

Turnip for what