Turnip Jokes

What did the vegetable say to the dj?

lettuce turnip the beet

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What did the vegatable say to the fruit?

Turnip

What vegetable parties the hardest?

A Turnip.

How do farmers party?

They turnip the beets!

What do root vegetables do at tha club?

Turnip

What did the collard green do when his favorite song came on the radio?

He got turnip

What did the farmer say to Lil Jon?

Turnip for what

What do snotty vegetables do when they see something they don't like ?

They 'turnip' their noses.

What kinda vegetables like to party?

Lettuce turnip da beet!

What did the carrot say when the last vegetable arrived at the party?

TURNIP

What did the farmer say about his missing vegetables?

Lettuce pray they turnip.

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What did the vegetables say at the garden party?

Lettuce turnip the beet

What was the vegan rock band's first hit?

Lettuce turnip the beet!

What did one turnip say to the other?

We're white and bulbous, just like America

What do vegetables that go to college do on the weekends?

They Turnip

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How do trees encourage one another?

They say "I'm rooting for you"

What was Bernie Sander's favorite topic in mathematics?

Radicals. He loved finding the "root" of problems...

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Why did the DJ get fired as a waiter?

Because he'd drop everything

What did the carrot say to the DJ?

Lettuce Turnip The Beet

Collard Green Jokes More Collard Green Jokes

What did the collard green do when his favorite song came on the radio?

He got turnip

What do you call black vegetables?

Collard greens

Lettuce Jokes More Lettuce Jokes

Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable?

Because it's all heart.

What vegetable has Avoidant Personality Disorder?

Lettuce alone!*

Favorite Song Jokes More Favorite Song Jokes

What's her favorite song?

I'm Going Through the Big D and Don't Mean Dallas

What did the collard green do when his favorite song came on the radio?

He got turnip

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when a high school calls in a replacement teacher for a subject they know nothing about?

Ooops... wrong sub.

What happens at night in Bangladesh?

It gets Dhaka

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

Why don't churches, synagogues, mosques and temples have Wi-Fi?

Because religions don't like competing with an invisible power that actually works.

Weekend Jokes More Weekend Jokes

What do vegetables that go to college do on the weekends?

They Turnip

How JokeExplainBot spent his weekend?

Explaining his wife.