What do you call a fake psychic who was found out and now shoots up in ditches?

A high medium low

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What do you call a dictatorship founded on the principles of Ethos, Logos & Pathos?

An Aristotalitarian Regime.

What time of day are you not able to find your watch?

4:04

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Why did John Lennon get shot?

because Mark Chapman was a terrible shot, and kept missing Yoko.

What do you do when you see your wife stumbling around in the backyard?

Shoot her again.

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What do you call Batman when he ditches church?

Christian Bale

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, lying in a ditch?

Phil