What does it take for a soldier in uniform to pick up a girl?

a smile and wave!

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Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?

A girl raises her hand and says, "I don't know. I've never been bolted before."

What's the difference between a tribe of pygmy cannibals and the girls cross country team?

The pygmy cannibals are cunning runts.

Wave Jokes More Wave Jokes

Why is the sand so quiet?

Because the waves keep going "shhhhhh".

How do you get a one armed man off a tree?

You wave to him

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

How do you know a black woman is pregnant?

When she pulls out the tampon, the cotton's been picked clean.

What do you do when you drop your favorite ska record?

PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP!

Soldier Jokes More Soldier Jokes

What's the scariest 3 letter acronym for a soldier in Afghanistan with a 15 year old daughter at home?

IUD

What do you say to a soldier who doesn't turn up for Camouflage training?

Well done.

Smile Jokes More Smile Jokes

What did the dog say after a hard day at work ?

Today sure was ruff" Read that today on my university's art wall and made me smile a bit , thought i'd share it :P

Why is the word "smiles" the longest word in English?

Because there is a mile separating the two s'es.

Uniform Jokes More Uniform Jokes

Why is Bill infuriated with Chelsea's new private school?

A: They broke family tradition by making her wear a uniform.

What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals ?

A guard dog !