What if I see a puppy?

What if my house burns down

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why did the blonde burn her ear?

The phone rang while she was ironing!

What do burnt pizza, frozen beer and a pregnant chick have in common?

Some douchebag forgot to pull it out in time.

Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

How do you get a puppy to stay the same size forever?

You stop feeding it.

House Jokes More House Jokes

Why did the architect have his house made backwards?

So he could watch the football

What's the name of that German guy that keeps hiding my stuff around the house?

Alzheimer, Grandma.