How do you get a puppy to stay the same size forever?

You stop feeding it.

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Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

When she asks "is that your puppy?

say "No. That's my dad." Then storm off.

How do you know when you should get a puppy?

When life's getting a little ruff ...I'll see myself out

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the bicycle stop moving?

Because it was two-tiered.

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

How can we keep our school Clean?

Student : By Staying at home. :p

What did King Midas say to the centaur?

Stay gold, Ponyboy.

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

Why don't cannibals have dogs?

Because you're not supposed to feed them people food.

How does J.G. Wentworth tell you that he's hungry?

It's my tummy, and I feed it NOW!"

Size Jokes More Size Jokes

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.

What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.