What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times?

Two octopuses shaking hands.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How does Kris Kringle clean his hands?

Santatizer

How do you know if a woman is hot for you?

When you stick your hand in her underpants it feels like you're feeding a horse.

Shake Jokes More Shake Jokes

Who would win in a fight, Michael J. Fox or Taylor Swift?

Michael J. Fox he would just shake it off.

Why is the fridge shaking so much?

It's running just fine. Probrably because it's so turned on!

Octopus Jokes More Octopus Jokes

How do you know you're always about to have fun in the company of an octopus?

Because it's always ten-to-cool time...

What do you get when you mix a Mexican and an octopus?

I don't know, but it sure can wash a lot of dishes.

Sixteen Jokes More Sixteen Jokes

How many Wake Forest fraternity brothers does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?

Seventeen. One to do it and sixteen to shell the M&M's.

What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times?

Two octopuses shaking hands.