What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

Previous Random Joke Next

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why do proctologists like Facebook?

It's another chance to look up old friends.

Why did the global warming activist compliment the earth?

Cause it looked hotter than usual! (I'll see myself out)

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why type of lightning likes to play sports?

Ball lightning

How do you sell chocolate to a deaf/foreign person?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY SOME CHOCOLATE?!

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Who forgot his phone charger today?

THIS gu

What do you want to work on today?

Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Why did they have to cancel the volleyball games in the special olympics?

It wasn't going over too well.

Why is it spelled 'cancelled' in the UK, but 'canceled' in the US?

Because the US gave the UK that L back in 1776.

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

How does a barber make phone calls?

He cuts them short.

Why is my hairline receding?

Barber: It's not. Your scalp is advancing.

Carol Jokes More Carol Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

What do crack addicts sing while caroling?

All I Want for Christmas is my two front teeth!