When the hell did you grow a beard?

Me: This morning. On the way here. Just felt like it was time.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who were the fastest readers of all time?

The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

How many times did I tell you to make your bed?

Jane: I can't answer. I didn't know I was supposed to keep count!

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What's the difference between the cries of a grieving family and reggae music?

I would feel awkward dancing to reggae music.

How can you tell if a Mexican is feeling sad?

They're wearing a SOMBERERO

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

What did the baby skunk want to be when he grew up?

A big stinker!

What's a man?

Dad: A man is who loves unconditionally , cares about you and protects you. Kid: When i grow up, I'll be a man like mom

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How do you get a dead turtle to flip itself back over on its feet?

You take the letter F out of way.

How does Jaden Smith keep getting roles in big movies?

Where there's a Will, there's a way.

Beard Jokes More Beard Jokes

How do philosophers shave off their beards?

Occam's razor

Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?

A: A barber.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why did Richard leave his home this morning?

For Harambe.

What did the lonely ghost do at 2 in the morning?

He made a booo-ty call