How many times did I tell you to make your bed?

Jane: I can't answer. I didn't know I was supposed to keep count!

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What do Philadelphia Eagles fans do after they win the superbowl?

Turn of madden and go to bed. (I'm an eagles fan)

How can you tell when it's time to go to bed at Michael Jacksons house?

When the big hand touches the little hand

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the definition of stalking?

When two people takes a long, romantic walk on the beach, but only one of them knows about it

What rhymes and let's you instantly know a redditor is a moron?

Purple circle.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How do you find a dirty cop?

Call 911, it doesn't matter who answers

What's the difference between toilet paper and shower curtains?

If you answered "I don't know." I would like to tell you that I spent all day cleaning that mess up.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Where were you?

Uh, with my.. gf " Gf Well, tell us about her! What's her name commercial on tv uh.. Lisa.. Brandnewtoyota

How do you confuse a polish laborer?

Lay down three shovels and tell him to take his pick.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who is a battery manufacturer's favorite baseball player of all time?

Al Kaline.

How did Genghis Khan conquer Mongolia?

One steppe at a time.

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How many chicken does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Still counting. Those darned birds can't seem to cross the road to get over here to screw in the light bulb.

How many black guys does it take to screw a lightbulb?

You cant count them when its dark

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore?

Am I supposed to pick my favorite

How many editors does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: It was supposed to be in place last week!