Which wiki do dyslexic pastry chefs claim to be trying to visit before getting arrested?

www.filopedia.org

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Why was Hillary thrown out of a restaurant?

She trashed the bill. Alt punch line 1 (u/Causative): She demanded her own private server and tried to have her meals removed.

What did Gandalf say when he tried to shut down Auschwitz?

You shall not gas!"

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What did Abe Lincoln say when he was arrested?

I'm-in-a-cent!

What did Bill Cosby say when he was arrested?

Hey, hey, hey, it was only a pudding pop!

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Why would anybody ever want to visit New Brunswick?

I hear their bowling alleys are pretty nice.

What time do philosophers like to visit the shopping mall?

At the Schopenhauer.

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What is the difference between a tube and a foolish Dutchman?

One is a hollow cylinder and the other a silly Hollander. Source (Cause I can't claim fame for Victorian era jokes):

What's 12 inches long, stiff, full of sperm and can make a girl scream?

The sock under my bed. (I don't remember where I heard it. Can't claim ownership.)