Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the difference between 1 Gb and 2 Gb?

Student - Well, I don't know. I guess one is a bit too high?

What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?

I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas?

GLOVES! Just kidding, he hasn't opened the box yet.

What did the boy with no legs and arms get for Christmas?

Cancer

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?

Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

What kinds of people don't get invited to blonde parties?

A: Women!

Guarantee Jokes More Guarantee Jokes

What is the 100% guaranteed way to get younger looking skin?

Believe in reincarnation.

How alcoholic is a drink that's guaranteed to get you drunk?

Fool proof!

White Christmas Jokes More White Christmas Jokes

Why did the black kid wish for a white Christmas?

Because all his white friends got better gifts than him.

What is Martin Luther King's least favorite Christmas song?

I'm dreamin' of a white Christmas

Charlie Sheen Jokes More Charlie Sheen Jokes

What did Charlie Sheen say when he won the Tour de France?

Schwinning!

How did Charlie Sheen contract HIV?

By banging 7-gram rocks.