Why are orchestra intermissions only twenty minutes long?

A: So the violists don't need to be retrained.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What machine do you need to make a girl fall in love with you ?

An ATM machine

Why did I need to bring a shovel on my first date?

Clearly the chloroform wasn't enough.

Violist Jokes More Violist Jokes

What's the difference between a violist and a dressmaker?

A: A dressmaker tucks up frills.

What do you call the folks who hang around the musicians at conservatories?

A: Violists.

Minute Jokes More Minute Jokes

What did the egg say to the hot water?

Give me a minute to get hard, i just got laid by some chick.

How long does it take to fly to Boston?

The clerk said "Just a minute..." "Thank you" the man said and hung up.

Retrain Jokes More Retrain Jokes

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?

It takes too long to retrain them.

Why are Canadians given only a half hour for lunch?

They don't want to have to retrain them.