Violist Jokes

Why don't violists get stressed?

Because they have nothing to fret about!

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why don't violists play hide and seek?

A: Because no one will look for them.

Why are orchestra intermissions only twenty minutes long?

A: So the violists don't need to be retrained.

What do you call the folks who hang around the musicians at conservatories?

A: Violists.

What's the difference between a violist and a dressmaker?

A: A dressmaker tucks up frills.

Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?

A: Because if they get lost it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist?

A: Terrorists have sympathizers.

You might also enjoy:

Terrorist Jokes More Terrorist Jokes

What do you call a terrorist with eight legs?

An Iraqnid.

Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated?

Snow boarding is fun as hell.

Sympathizer Jokes More Sympathizer Jokes

What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist?

A: Terrorists have sympathizers.

What's the difference between terrorists and tourists?

Terrorists have sympathizers.

Musician Jokes More Musician Jokes

Why can you trust a musician?

Because he always gives sound advice. Ba dum tsss.

What do you call those people who follow musicians around and try to hang with them after the show?

Drummers.

Folk Jokes More Folk Jokes

What does a Men's Rights activist call a broken hand?

Celibacy. (Edit: LOL! Seems I've "triggered" some folks with broken hands and fedora collections.)

What do you call the hot tub that two folks just made love in?

H2OOOHHHGG

Conservatory Jokes More Conservatory Jokes

What do you call the folks who hang around the musicians at conservatories?

A: Violists.

Where do David Cameron and his party meet?

In the Conservatory!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Whitney Houston and Houston, TX?

Houston, TX will once again reach 98 degrees.

What's the difference between a bird, and a bird with only one wing?

It's a matter of a pinion(http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pinion).

Age Jokes More Age Jokes

What did the pirate pirate say on his 80th birthday?

I can't believe I'm still illegally downloading movies at this age!"

What gets better with age?

Necrophilia

Tuck Jokes More Tuck Jokes

What's the difference between a violist and a dressmaker?

A: A dressmaker tucks up frills.

Where's your buccaneers?

The pirate responds, "tucked inside my buck'n hat!!"