Why couldn't 5 stop drinking?

Which phone??

Person 1 : Suggest me a good phone to buy nowadays. Person 2 : Microsoft Lumia 950 XL is good for winters, will keep you warm. Very warm. Person 1 : So what about summers then? Person 2 : Same, it freezes often as well

Why did the Dictator ban Soda?

Because there couldnt be 2-liters.

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What is the difference between a hog and a man?

A: A hog doesn't have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night just so he can f*** some pig.

Where do detectives go to have a drink?

The Search Bar.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What did the vampire do to stop his son biting his nails ?

He cut all his fingers off !

What lands first?

The leaf, a rope stopped the emo.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What are the 5 best Vegetables of all time?

tink about it. Gai lan, gai lan... gai lan, gai lan, and gai lan. (thanks to Chapelle show skit((making the band)))

How will Santa get in?

Me: Probably through my credit card. 5: what Me: what

Turnt Jokes More Turnt Jokes

What does an egg say when he's getting turnt?

Omelette!!

Why was the Xbox 360 named as it was?

Cos when I seen one i turnt 360 degrees and walked away Playstation for life xD