Why does James Bond keep telling people his real name?

Worst. Spy. Ever.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call a Chinaman that does everything given what other people do?

Bayesian.

How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs?

Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce.

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Why were the 5 gorgeous young blonde Danish fashion models sobbing their eyes out?

I told them I wasn't going to give birth to them.

What did the farmer tell the hoe?

Let's get dirty.

Spy Jokes More Spy Jokes

Why did the spy steal the laptop?

It had a sticker that said 'intel inside'.

What do you call it when a book spies on people?

A: A peeping tome.

James Bond Jokes More James Bond Jokes

Why is James Bond a terrible motivational speaker?

Because the audiences are shaken, not stirred.

What does James Bond say after a heavy workout?

I would like to have Whey. Shaken, not stirred.

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What is Victoria's Secret?

Her' real name is Victor!

What's a man's idea of honestly in a relationship?

A. Telling you his real name.