Why is a man's pee yellow, and his sperm white?

So he can tell if he's coming or going.

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Why did Santa divorce Mrs Clause?

because he only came once a year

What did you do today?

Mum: Well, the builders that moved the garage came over and I paid them for their work done.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell if you've lost an argument on Facebook?

Well first you're are in an argument on Facebook.

How do you tell if Lady Gaga is dead or not?

You PO PO PO POKE HER FACE PO PO POKE HER FACE!

Sperm Jokes More Sperm Jokes

What does a sperm and a politician have in common?

They both have a one in 100 million chance of being human.

What do sperm and politicians have in common?

About 1 in every 500 or 600 million have a chance at becoming human.