Why should you never tell jokes on the ice?

The ice might crack up! I use this at the beginning of conversations... it's a reall ice breaker.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What is the most recycled joke that keeps getting used?

Your mom.

How does a hipster measure out his drugs?

Using instagrams.

Crack Jokes More Crack Jokes

What did the fish scream when its tank cracked?

Dam-it!"

What's a drug addict's favorite music genre?

Crack rock

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell a chemist no?

Nitrogen Monoxide

How can you tell if a duck has soul?

If it's bill withers!

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why did EA cross the road?

The punchline for this joke is 0.99$

What do you call a nosy hot pepper?

Jalapeno business! ha ha.. haha.. ha love this joke (Usually accompanied with three snaps of the fingers in the shape of the letter Z and moving my head from side to side)

Begin Jokes More Begin Jokes

What word that begins with "N" and ends with "R" do you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

What did Pippin Took do when he was drunk?

He began to feel Merry.

Ice Jokes More Ice Jokes

How do you drown a polar bear?

Cut a hole in the ice. Put a line of peas around the hole. When the polar bear takes a pea, kick him in the ice hole.

How do you get a polar bear in the water?

First, you cut a hole in the ice, then you sprinkle some pees around the hole. When the polar bear goes to take a pee, you kick him in the ice hole!

Conversation Jokes More Conversation Jokes

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

Conversation

What did one pile of wood chips say to the other?

Nothing. They weren't mulch for conversation.