Action Jokes

What would happen if James Bond took Viagra?

He would continue to be a state-sponsored terrorist whose actions disgrace us all.

This joke may have profanity.

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What do you call an action of copyright law against a ghost?

An exor- .

What's the difference between feminism and Islam?

One is demonized by the actions and beliefs of a small minority. The other believes in the wage gap myth.

Why don't baseball players get much action?

Because they have foul balls.

What kind of court order would be placed on a pig in order to prevent it from taking a specific course of action?

A: An inj-oink-tion.

What do you call the action of a banker buying weed?

A dank transaction

Why did the jellyfish's wife leave him?

He stung her into action.

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

Why did the librarian hush the mime?

Because actions speak louder than words.

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Presidential Candidate Jokes More Presidential Candidate Jokes

Why did the Mayor take so long to endorse a Presidential candidate?

Because he was running on CP time.

Which presidential candidate is the most likely to cause cancer?

Ben Carsonogen

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

Why did Newton's wife got pregnant?

Because he doesn't believe in using quantum

Why don't Buddhists have Instagram?

They don't believe in the concept of a selfie.

Prevent Jokes More Prevent Jokes

Why do women need to wear jockstraps while skydiving?

To prevent them from whistling.

What kind of court order would be placed on a pig in order to prevent it from taking a specific course of action?

A: An inj-oink-tion.

Feminism Jokes More Feminism Jokes

What are the three kinds of women's cancer?

1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism

What's the difference between feminism and Islam?

One is demonized by the actions and beliefs of a small minority. The other believes in the wage gap myth.

Ea Jokes More Ea Jokes

Why did EA remove gender restrictions in The Sims 4?

They're just doing their small part, because EA loves micro trans actions.

What do you call a Battlefront without EA?

Bttlfront

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock?

You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...

What's the difference a teckel and the United Nations?

There's none. They both have big hearts but a short reach.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one to hold it in place while the rest of Europe runs circles around it.

Why must you be religious to join the Navy?

Because it's a place of war ship.

Solve Jokes More Solve Jokes

Why can't Atheist solve exponential equations?

Because they don't believe in higher powers

What do troll mathematicians like to solve?

Parabolems?